To Fred, From Kayley
by fevil-devil
Summary: One shot. A letter to Fred from an Oc named Kayley. Read if you're up for a good cry.  "Dear Fred,  I hope you're doing well, where ever you are. I miss you. I don't know why I keep writing to you. It kind of gives me a sense of hope I guess."


Dear Fred,

I hope you're doing well, where ever you are. I miss you. I don't know why I keep writing to you. It kind of gives me a sense of hope I guess. Gives me a feeling that you could come back. But I know it'll never happen. It's been a year since you left. You've moved on. I just can't seem to let go of you. I just can't seem to let go of the fact that I'll never be with you again. I'll never hug you, or kiss you again. We'll never be able to cuddle under the old tree in my backyard. I'll never see the twinkle in your eyes whenever you had an idea. I always loved your ideas.

You always said we would get married and grow old together. We'd have a small quiet ceremony just like you wanted. I'd have been in a beautiful white gown and you in a tux. Ginny would have been my bridesmaid and George your best man. We had it planned. Yes, we were young but in love. You had always said that the only other girl you'd ever love was out daughter. I always believed you. I still do.

You promised George that you two of you would grow old together too. It's sad to think that the only time George and I will ever see you old would have been when you tried to cross Dumbledore's age line with George. Do you remember that? George does.

He really misses you. He's changed a lot since you left. He hardly smiles anymore and sometimes I wonder if he'll ever be able to laugh again. I wonder if hell ever be happy again. He's gotten older too. It looks like he's been aging faster than all of us. I really worry about him. I always tell him to take care of himself for your sake. It rarely works.

Sometimes, we spend hours talking about you. We wish you'd come back. I wish you could just read my letters.

I remember the first time we kissed. It was probably the worst first kiss I've ever had. I loved it. I remember that you and George had set off the fireworks you had made in the Great Hall. You were both flying around on your brooms, making all sorts of havoc. I always admired how you both could get away with things like that. It's one of the reasons why I love you. You came around on your broom and you were just about to leave, when I chased after you. You came back for me. Told me to be a good girl and that you liked me. Then you kissed me.

I'll never forget that.

I wonder if you'll wait for me, where ever you are. I wonder if I'll ever be able to see you orange hair and bright blue eyes again. I want to be able to hold you hand again. I want so much that I'll never have.

Of course there's always George. He looks so much like you. But he's different.

I have a confession to make: I haven't really been trying to forget you. I know I should be. It's been breaking me. I'm worse off than George most days. I eat very little now. I hardly sleep since it's when I see you. It's hard to look at you. Just seeing you makes me cry sometimes. I never really leave the Burrow either. George leaves sometimes to tend to the shop. He keeps it running for you. He says that it's in loving memory of you since you both worked so hard together to get it up and running.

It's been hard on all of us.

Ginny still cries at least once a week. She has Harry now. He keeps her safe and happy and she cries less with he's with her. I just thought you'd like to know that. Ron's happy too. He has Hermione, though we both know that sometimes it's not always a good thing. He doesn't cry. Instead he sulks. Percy sulks too i don't think they have it in them to cry. Charlie and Bill came to visit a week after you had left to try to make up for your loss. It made it worse. Them trying to replace you just wasn't right. Your Mum tried to yell at them but didn't have the heart to. She didn't want to hurt them. Didn't want them to leave on a bad note in case they left like you had. There their intentions were good i suppose but it didn't help. Everyone deals with it differently.

Your Mum and Dad are doing well. They try not to talk about you. The holidays are strange and sometimes painful. Especially April Fools day. Your birthday. It's not a day of fun though we try our best. We all know you would want us to be happy but it's hardest on George. To him it's a day dedicated to your memory. It's the most important day ever. The day that you were born.

Christmas isn't the same without you either. Your Mum started sobbing halfway through opening gifts. She made you a jumper and everything. I'm sending it to you with the letter. No one could stand the silence. We still can't.

I have another confession: this is my last letter to you Fred. This is my final good-bye. George is going to stop writing too. It's been a year. I don't want to stop writing. I feel like if I stop writing, it'll be like I stopped wanting you. It would be like I'm giving you up. But I'm not and I never will. Ginny says I need move on. It's not healthy. But I don't think I can. Everything reminds me of you. We were together for so long. We went everywhere together. Simply forgetting you is easier said than done. You don't nee to worry though Fred, you'll always be with me and I will never forget you.

I need you to know something before my letter ends. Fred, I love you. I will always love you. Wait for me.

Always,

Kayley


End file.
